I know there are many sons and daughters who don’t have their fathers in their lives for a myriad of reasons and I know that it may sting a little or a lot when Father’s Day happens every year. My dad Keith Kong died in 2008 and I don’t particularly pay attention to the holiday anymore. I’m not sure that’s because I’m trying to avoid thinking about his passing or whether with time, it’s just not that important to me anymore. My dad still comes to me in my dreams occasionally and those dreams I always count as special. Usually my mom is with him as they were in life. I can still miss him to the point where I well up with tears and it happens randomly triggered by a memory or some circumstance.
I’m grateful that he was my father. Of course, he wasn’t perfect, but the essence of who he was … was decent, honest and kind. He didn’t express himself openly nor was he emotionally present (that wasn’t what his generation was about), but he showed his love through his deeds and his acts of service. My dad and mom definitely showed their love through food. Whichever dish their children or grandchildren wanted to have for Sunday dinner, our wish was their command. Everything they cooked was homemade and no time and effort were spared.
My ba (Chinese for dad) is still with me in spirit and I’m thankful to have had him in my life. Happy Father’s Day.